As a consequence of the season, most of our cars are garaged and perhaps even irrevocably bundled up for the winter. Mine sits forlornly, gathering dust, and glaring jealously at me each morning as I fire up the Mazda for the trip to work. We all know that cars do not understand why winter comes, or why their servants (we can hardly be called owners of apparitions which require so much attention) ignore them for weeks on end. They do not understand that we are only trying to protect them, just as we protect our children from the dangers and vicissitudes of life. Still, neither children nor cars understand such sacrifices on their behalf.

To be honest, I am not entirely sure that I understand, either. After all, until our roads become layered with salt and chemicals, there is no reason at all not to continue to drive our British cars. After all, it’s no big deal. In my case, all it takes is (i) thirty minutes to erect its removable hood — a device which only have been designed by a British automotive engineer; (ii) another twenty minutes to jump-start batteries which have grown feeble from non-use and cold; (iii) ten minutes to restore air to flattened tires; (iv) fifteen minutes to do a general pre-flight in a futile effort to verify that other systems are working properly; (v) a further twenty minutes in the house, bandaging various cuts and bruises encountered in the above steps. After ninety minutes of preparation, we’re ready to charge into the wilderness. Unfortunately, that ninety minutes generally represents the extent of daylight hours available in this part of the country from dawn to dusk, which means that headlights and tail-lights are required. Of course, that equipment generally operates perfectly during the daytime, but never at night, and we thus find ourselves back in the garage, staring moodily into the distance and cursing the vagaries of fate which landed us in Kentucky instead of Florida or California.

Thankfully, there are things to do in the midst of this woe. We can plan our automotive projects for the spring and stockpile parts. Those interested in acquiring another car can further those plans, secure in the probably fallacious knowledge that prices are lower in the winter months. We can organize the stacks of automotive magazines that have accumulated unread during the summer months. We can sit in our easy chairs and make car noises. Such a thing has the dual benefit of clearing the sinuses and driving our spouse crazy, particularly when those emissions emulate the sound of leaking oil.

Another possibility is to renew our support for the local British Car Club. In this part of the country, it is universally acknowledged that the Sterling British Motoring Society is the best such opportunity: Brilliant, erudite, and sophisticated members; an inspired and impassioned leadership; spectacular events — and all for only $20.00 per year!!! What more could one ask? Where else can you buy 50 friends for only a twenty-dollar bill?

Spitting in the face of snow, sleet, rain and sub-freezing temperatures, the stalwart membership of the Sterling British Motoring Society will continue to meet during the winter, on the first Tuesday of each month at 6:30 PM. The default location is Graham’s Grill at Old Silo Golf Course in Mt. Sterling, Kentucky. We do meet in other locations, and the modest membership fee mentioned above will provide access to that information as well as many other secrets.

These meetings are important, because they renew our friendships with people with the same weird and unfathomable obsession, provide data which can then be used to assist screwing up future car projects, offer excellent food and drink, and generally give us some hope for a future which will offer sunshine, long days, high temperatures, and the admittedly-oxymoronic promise of smoothly-functioning British powerplants. Finally, our winter meetings are used to make plans for the summer — where to go, what to do, how to do it, and who to do it with. Attendance will enable you to participate in that planning. Absence will mean that you have no voice, no clue, and that you will be disenfranchised. How very sad for you. Since people who drive British Cars typically feel powerless in the face of a growing army of giant and uncaring SUV’s, it is doubly tragic to belong to an affinity group and then not participate in a meaningful way.

Even through the relatively benign months of fall, our group has been planning. One noble and far-reaching decision has been to engage in at least one outing during each of the warm weather months — in addition to our regular meetings, of course. Kentucky is a scenic place, visited by thousands of nonresidents just for the vistas; at the same time, our fixation with on-time travel and interstate highways has robbed those who actually live here of the beauty around us. Our monthly journeys will restore that appreciation, exercise our cars, get us off the couch, and bring us into contact with kindred spirits.

The November meeting resulted in the following general itineraries, each offered by club members willing to plan the route and arrange for food stops along the way:

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More information will be provided about these trips during the winter months. However, each presents a chance to see a different part of the region. Each has a general sponsor, but, also, each will need additional volunteers to help plan and coordinate. That work will occur during the long, dark winter. Think about volunteering to help with one or more treks.

Lest it be assumed that our group journeys about only in good weather, let it be known that many enjoyed a wonderful trip a couple of weeks ago. Although your editor was unable to attend, the following, well written account is provided by Jim Bennett and Cheryle Cole-Bennett:

A Three Hour Cruise
A hearty group of intrepid volunteers from the Sterling British Motoring Society recently completed a Kentucky back-roads motoring adventure. Various (both in condition and name) LBCs braved what was predicted to be pouring rain to participate in the Oktoberfest "Three Hour Cruise." Despite dire warnings of pouring rain from the weatherperson, whom it turned out was totally wrong (again), seven cars started the sortie and six actually finished the day. The driving event started at noon, as all good events should, with a hearty meal. The rustic theme of the day (LBCs) was enhanced over lunch by the décor at Hall’s on the River restaurant. Just as everyone was ready for an afternoon nap, we started on our circuitous journey of Clark, Fayette and mostly western Madison County under beautiful sunny skies. Many of the blacktop roads on the 70-mile journey were so narrow that a centerline would have taken up too much of the path (road). Fortunately, Paul’s bright yellow Sprite brought up the rear and was easy to spot from the lead car. Thus, everyone actually took the same tour.